I love my kids. I love my kids. I love my kids. No really, I do! Some days are just easier than others.
My sweet Delaney is a princess. I little tiny 11 pound princess. I love her to pieces. Yesterday was just not a good day. It seemed like any time I got her to sleep, and try to sneakily put her down, within five minutes she was sca-ream-ing. Bouncy chair? Nope. Swing? Don't think so. Tummy time? Perish the thought! Life stops for no Laney, princess or wailing banshee.
I wake up to Garrison's piercing scream at 6:30. It's been one week since we moved him into his big boy bed, (It's a pretty cool bed. Todd made it.) so there's a myriad of things that could be causing this. Is he in the kitchen with the knives? Did he knock the TV over on himself? Whew. No. His leg is just stuck in the guard rail on his bed. I un-stick the leg, pop a sippee in his mouth, then I'm heading back to bed to get another 15 minutes of sleep.
JUST KIDDING! His wailing woke up Chloe. So my day begins. Get Chloe dressed, homework signed, lunch made, hair brushed, breakfast, Laney diaper change, Garrison diaper change, shoes on, keys...where are my keys? In the car, drop off Chloe, get home.
Garrison- "What's that sound? Oh, I know! Birdies! Hi birdies! Tweet! Tweet!"
Me- "Hi birdies! Bye birdies"
Laney- "Feed me or you will die!" (it's a loose translation)
Me- "Garrison inside, come on buddy."
Me- thinks *Yes! I got them both to cry simultaneously! I am Supreme Mother Overlord!* ...right...
Inside, refill Garrison's sippee, dump out some blocks, and get about feeding my patient baby girl. Ahhh, blessed silence.
Now, it's this time in the day where I usually plan out what needs to get done, think about what I can realistically accomplish, and what I would be satisfied with completing if everything went to heck in a hand basket. Let's see, dishes, sweep, about 10 loads of laundry (four of which are clean on the couch, two in the machines, and another four more in queue), sheets, bathrooms, vacuum, need to make bread for lunches...oh, good she finished her bottle and is sleeping. I'll be able to get half of this stuff done before she wakes up!
I start attacking the kitchen, five minutes later, crying. So I move laundry along, make a small bottle and sit back down. She's started taking an extra two ounces before bed, maybe she's still hungry. Change the diaper, just in case and she takes one ounce and is out. I hold her for another ten minutes, then realize that I haven't had breakfast or fed Garrison yet. So, I go lay her down in her bed. It's quieter back there, she should sleep longer...yeah, nope...pick her back up and get working on some oatmeal.
This is my day. All. Day. Long.
Somehow, between holding Laney and working one handed, or listening to her cry (for an accumulative four hours) and working super speed, I managed to clean the kitchen, sweep the floors, finish the laundry, make lunch and dinner, and work with Todd in the yard pulling weeds (don't be impressed, it was for about 20 minutes before Garrison "accidentally" kicked her in the head and she woke up and started crying again).
Before we sit down for dinner I vent to Todd about how she has been crying all day, and if you have kids, you KNOW how draining it is. Before I had kids it was, yeah yeah, they're crying, so what? NO! As a mom, I have to be able to FIX things. If my kids are upset it stresses me out like CRAZY. I turn into a mindless zombie slave and clean. So Todd takes her and lays her down in her bed and closes the door.
Todd- "She's clean, she's fed, no ear infection, no rash...she's gotten used to being held, she's just crying to cry...and you need to eat."
I love him.
Let the timer commence. Let the stress begin. Let the mommy self deprecating feelings take hold. Let the need for chocolate chip cookies wash over you. Let the sound of the hand mixer drown out the screaming.
I ate six cookies. Six. But I felt much better...and she stopped crying and slept for an hour. I got to laugh with Chloe and Garrison, clean melted chocolate off the floors, and Garrison's entire body. Todd had brought home some bread, and folded the laundry. We got to read an article from The Friend, get the kids to bed, and give Delaney her last feeding before she fell asleep for the rest of the night. Then I was able to fall asleep with my head in Todd's lap while he brushed my hair. One of my favorite things of all time.
Bottom line is, I love my family. I love my kids. Even if I had to listen to Delaney cry for the next three months, I wouldn't love her any less. I know that with Todd by my side we can do anything. I know that in two weeks I'll be able to start feeding Delaney cereals and she will be MUCH more satisfied and start putting on more weight. I guess with the third child I can start to appreciate the fact that they are only small for such a short amount of time. It's all about perspective right? Well, right about now I'm wishing that I hadn't eaten so many dang cookies.